Style Breakdown: 9 of Spring's Strangest Heels

With the weather starting to warm up, designers are rolling their tan and toe-airing footwear. Scrolling through my trusty online shops, I've noticed an influx of interesting plaforms--some beauties, some beasts. Here's just a handful of Spring's strangest shoe styles.

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Frame by United Nude - $545.00, UnitedNude.com
United Nude has some of the most structually fascinating shoes on the market right now, and no wonder: The line was founded by an architect and shoemaker. I can easily imagine a 50 ft version of these installed in a public space. Modern buildings and modern heels are both in the business of defying gravity, right?
Two Hundred by Ego and Greed - $89.99, Solestruck.com
Dubbed the "flatform" I was surprised to see shoemakers return to the sole that ravers, Spice Girls and Misfits (think creepers) made popular back in 90s. In a sandal, it just feels like treatment for an orthopedic ailment.


Leopard Open Toe Platform by Estelle - $750.00, OpeningCeremony.com
An almost flatform, its not so much the shape as the colors that make me cringe. It's not so much leopard, as it is a block of melted, crispy cheese. Combined with the meaty/bacon-y silk ruffles and shiny surface, these shoes are more fit for a greasy diner than for an equally greasy disco.


Femmes by Gee Wa Wa - $219.95, SoleStruck.com
Despire the oppressively heavy looking platform and the fact it looks like a headless cat cartoon when you squint, this style has a wonderful balance between feminine and badass. Dubbed a "claw" heel, the cut out platform actually reminds me of the Shel Silverstein book The Missing Piece.


Ferme by Jeffrey Campbell - $222.00, Lulus.com
File these under "Are You Serious?" These are true platforms because they look like shoes from the Medieval Times costume closet standing on their own little stages. There's no attempt to blend the two pieces, at least have the suede part of the heel be wood? An awful case of leftovers being tossed together.


Space Wood Wedge Sandal by Minimarket - $369.95, SoleStruck.com
Finally, a stylish solution to Shape-Ups! Ok maybe not, but this salad bowl-round platform is a solution to the chucky wedge without being too clunky. A great Swedish brand, their sunglasses are worth checking out as well.


Monroe Python Wedge by Carin Wester - $348.00, PixieMarket.com
They may not seem strange now, but do a Google Image search on "foot binding" and you'll see why the color and placement of the platform notch weirds me out.



Skate by Jeffrey Campbell - $214.95, SoleStruck.com
I guess the idea was to look like an old fashioned ice skate or sled, but to me it looks like scraps from a rocking chair or door frame. Nice concept, but too This Old House in its execution. Again, another example of Jeffrey Campbell just slapping anything together.
Crystallization by Iris van Herpen x United Nude - $995.00, UnitedNude.com
LUST LUST LUST! We've featured the Iris van Herpen x United Nude Synthesia boot before and had to give props to their other collaboration design. Utterly sexy, utterly unique, this style comes in three colors and also with chains instead of leather laces woven all over. I'm dying, I'm dead.